10 realities for the Neurotic Transman
1) The average height for a male is 5’8”. Hormones will not make you grow.
2) Men and women urinate differently. Men have a narrower stream and usually it hits the water higher up as they usually stand. Women have a wider stream, deeper sounding and pee facing the opposite direction, so it tends to, at least partially, hit the porcelain. Men don’t use toilet paper after peeing and toilet paper dispensers are loud. Bathrooms are dangerous because if it’s just you and one trans hating person, you could end up dead.
3) Your feet will not grow. I have been wearing shoes half a size too big for nearly 5 years.
4) When you are sitting with someone who doesn’t know you are trans, or you don’t know if they know, you will be inclined to think about how you present yourself continuously while also wondering if you will need to broach the topic. Even all your best practices to carry yourself like a gentleman will still leave room for insecurities. Do my eyes give me away? Avoid eye contact.
5) If you haven’t had top surgery, you’ll think about your chest constantly. Binding, not binding, how weight fluctuations make your chest change. When you decide that you are ready for top surgery and can afford it, you will spend years in limbo because you don’t know how to request the time off of work without being honest.
6) Men have bigger hands
7) Men have more narrow hips
8) Men don’t amass fat on their butts
9) Testosterone changes your voice but a lot of trans guys voices sound like they are stuck in perpetual puberty. You will think before you speak, while you are speaking, and after. It can be impossible to have a conversation because you can’t focus on anything but your voice.
10) Your instincts about all these things are not wrong, it’s not completely safe for transpeople in our current society. You will be stuck in a perpetual state of wanting to be more open and honest while simultaneously feeling exposed.